Bringing your A-game to a date goes way beyond wearing attractive clothes, stepping out of a sleek car, and using expensive cologne. Sure, women will be attracted to a man who can do a class act, but that’s not all that they are looking for. If despite checking all the boxes on what you believe to be first-date essentials, things haven’t been working out for you, chances are you could be making some mistakes unconsciously, which don’t reflect well on you.
Certain dating mistakes men make can ruin the best of nights. If you keep repeating these, you may soon notice your dating life flat-lining. So gentlemen, why don’t we take a look at some of the biggest dating mistakes that men tend to make. And try to avoid them.
Top 15 Mistakes That Men Make During Their Dates
Dating isn’t easy. But there’s absolutely no reason why you shouldn’t look forward to it. When you know exactly what to do and what to steer clear, the pressure eases up a little and you can truly enjoy the experience without letting dating anxiety get the better of you.
To that end, let’s look at some dating mistakes guys make that you must absolutely avoid so that your dates end up being nothing but classic romantic experiences. Avoid these dating mistakes like the plague and turn your first date into something memorable:
1. Talking too much about yourself
This is a major turn-off for your date. You come across as a self-obsessed person. Also, you lose the element of mystery around you. One of the mistakes guys make when dating is being a speaker and not a listener.
How to avoid: You need not be secretive about yourself. However, you should also focus on your date. Try to balance your conversations by giving her an equal amount of time to talk. Remember, listening to your date is more important than speaking.
2. Giving inappropriate compliments
A common mistake men make on dates is going overboard with their compliments to the point of being inappropriate. Saying, “You look very beautiful”, is okay but saying, “You have a sexy body”, might be highly inappropriate, especially in the initial stages of dating.
How to avoid: Sure, some women might like such compliments, but it’s best to behave like a gentleman and avoid inappropriate compliments.
3. Acting needy
You may think that you have an amazing connection with the women you are seeing, but don’t get too needy. This is a basic mistake men make while dating. For all you know, she might not like you as much as you like her. By being clingy, you are only spoiling your chances.
How to avoid: Restrict your phone calls and texts to regular hours and initiate contact only intermittently. In fact, playing a little hard-to-get by minimizing contact might boost your chances.
4. Lying about you
It is normal to exaggerate your strengths and downplay your flaws when meeting someone new but it should be within limits. In order to impress your date, an individual who can run 10 km can say that he ran 15 Km – no harm done. But someone who can’t run even 1 km without collapsing to the ground can’t and should NOT claim to be a marathon runner. The point is to try impressing her without deceiving her with your fake personality.
How to avoid: Don’t talk about your accomplishments if they’re not directly relevant to the conversation. Don’t exaggerate your professional or personal accomplishments or boast about how much money you have.
5. Asking, “How’s it going?”
This statement is an instant killjoy. No one likes to pause their date to gauge the progress.
How to avoid: If you’re genuinely interested to know whether she’s having a good time, better wait for the date to end. Go back home and ask her over text.
6. Fiddling with your cell phone
There is absolutely no place for ringtones and beeps on a romantic date. Unless it is an unavoidable call from work or from home, you shouldn’t spend time looking at your cell phone. Try spending that time looking into her eyes instead.
How to avoid: For the duration of the date, put your phone on silent and keep it out of reach. Request your date to do the same.
7. Having no plans
Women dread men who come on a date without a plan. It’s one of the most common dating mistakes men make. They agree to meet at a known location and then simply ask the woman, “Where do you want to go?” As much as women like being independent, they like men who can take charge of a situation more.
How to avoid: Before leaving for the date, make sure you have dinner reservations, a romantic spot to visit after dinner (usually a stroll away from the restaurant), and enough fuel to drive your date back to her place from any part of the town – provided she’s okay with it.
8. Talking about your ex
Talking and asking about each other’s ex(es) is the biggest pitfall every dating guru has ever warned about. We all have a past. Chances are that you might end up bringing unpleasant memories, ruining your romantic mood.
How to avoid: Find a pleasant and safe topic to talk about that will upset no one’s mood. Interests and hobbies are usually safe topics of conversation for the first few dates.
9. Accepting you’re nervous
Whether you have dated before or not, accepting that you’re nervous should only happen inside your head. Telling her that you’re nervous gives a poor impression. It shows you aren’t confident. And it kills any spark before it could even start.
How to avoid: Keep a self-assured body language. Speak with conviction and drop ‘maybe’ from your vocabulary for the night.
10. Getting physically intimate too soon
This one is a no-brainer. Strangely, it still is one of the most common dating mistakes made by men. If you try to get into her pants too soon, you will only make her feel like an object. It is one of the worst early dating mistakes that you should avoid at any cost.
How to avoid: If you like your date and want the relationship to grow, wait for the right time to get physical. Let it happen naturally instead of trying to force it. Although women prefer men to make the first move, you might want to wait for a signal before proposing physical intimacy.
11. Saying, “How come a beautiful girl like you is still single?”
Say this line and you become an instant doofus. This is not a compliment. You’re making her feel as if she is a desperate girl on a date parade.
How to avoid: If you wish to compliment her beauty, a simple, “You’re beautiful”, would do.
12. Reading out your resume
Men are socially conditioned to believe that their worth lies in their achievements. They also assume that women are impressed by a man’s socio-economic status. But never forget that you are dating her, not giving an interview.
How to avoid: Instead, try sharing some rare wisdom that you picked up while growing up or difficult life obstacles you overcame.
13. Waiting for her to make the first move
If you feel that this is the 21st century and she is going to make all the moves, you are deceived. Women still like the old traditions – they like to be chased.
How to avoid: Whether it is asking for a second date or making an intimate gesture, trust your gut and take charge of the situation.
14. Bad-mouthing previous dates
Men should seriously stop recounting their past dating fiascos. The situation becomes really awkward. Your date starts wondering if she’s going to be the next anecdote. All her focus gets channeled toward this one thought and nothing else you say after that makes any impact.
How to avoid: As far as possible, avoid recounting your previous dating experience. But if the topic does come up, be respectful and brief about it.
15. Giving up too soon
You might have made small dating mistakes like giving her the wrong impression by accidentally holding her hands too soon or waiting for her in the wrong location. But an even greater mistake would be to give up too soon on your date.
How to avoid: If you like her, then go ahead and apologize. Make it up to her and you might still have a chance.
10 Dating Etiquettes For Men To Keep It Smooth And Classy
We have discussed mistakes guys make when dating. But knowing what not to do is not enough, you need to know how not to be that guy who makes dating mistakes. Now that you’ve learned some tips about early dating mistakes, let’s take a look at what you need to turn your date into a classic romantic experience.
1. Be punctual
Being on time gives a good start to your date. It shows that you were looking forward to this date.
2. Work on your appearance
Your first impression actually has the potential to make a lasting impression on her mind. Take some time to dress appropriately for the occasion. It will show that you have put some effort into the date and will definitely make a good impression on her.
3. Be confident
From asking her questions to talking to the waiters, you cannot show that you’re nervous. The key to successful dating is confidence.
4. Walk her to her home
This is an age-old tradition and still does wonders. If you have picked her up from her place, then always make sure you drop her home. If she is taking a cab or the metro, then always walk her to the cab or the metro. The gentleman in you will surely make a good impression on the lady.
5. Don’t ask too many personal questions
It is good to ask questions to find out about each other. But asking too many personal questions will make your date more like a job interview. Try asking some interesting questions instead of the run-of-the-mill “What is the one thing you have done that you are very proud of?” or “If the world were to end tomorrow, how would you spend your last day?”
6. Try having fun
Dates are not always about food over a question-answer session. Try having some fun while getting to know each other. Share some jokes or funny childhood episodes. If you are outdoors, go to an adventure park or watch a horror movie.
7. Don’t try to win her
In their bid to win a woman over, most men agree to anything she says or showers her with compliments. Try earning her affection instead. Be a little hard-to-get but interested in her at the same time.
8. Text her immediately after you get home
If you had a good time and are genuinely interested to know this lady, then text her as soon as you get home. Let her know that you had a good time. If she had a good time, she will be more than happy to let you know. Sometimes men keep looking for a good time to text after a date but as long as you have hit it, it is all good time
9. Be the real you
No matter how smart, good-looking or attractive your date might be, she would always wish to know the real you. Be genuine in whatever you share about your life. Be true in your views, even if it means disagreeing with her. She is much more likely to fall for the real you than any other fake person you conjure up
10. Paying the bill
There have been opposing views when it comes to paying the bill. Some dating experts believe that women still like it when men insist on paying the bill. Others feel that women may see it as an assertion of masculinity. It all depends upon the woman you’re dating. If she is the assertive kind, it is better to ask if she wishes to go Dutch. If she is an old romantic, then probably you should insist on paying.
More often than not, dates can be nerve-wracking and difficult encounters. You want to make a strong impression on your prospective mate and lead them to see you in a light that will increase your chances of seeing them again. We have discussed most of the dating mistakes guys make and how to avoid them. These pointers should help you come off as warm, confident, and natural. You can’t guarantee the outcome of dates; all you can do is put your best foot forward and hope that things go your way. But these tips should at least ensure that you make a good impression. All the best, gentlemen. Now go ahead and win your lady.
